April 22, 2011

Rockin’ Review: Dr. Laura


***This Giveaway has CLOSED.*** Please check our Facebook Fan Page for the winner. Thanks to all of you who entered!

“Dr. Laura urgently conveys to women that the to take proper care of their husbands is to ensure themselves the happiness and satisfaction they yearn for in marriage. Women want to be in love, get married, and live happily ever after. Yet disrespect for men and disregard for the values, feelings, and needs of husbands has fast become the standard for male-female relations in America, often creating struggle and strife in what could be a beautiful relationship.”

I actually read this book when I was first married. My mother-in-law purchased it and we passed it around to all of the girls in the family. Since I had the opportunity to do this review, I decided to read it again. This is by far one of my favorite books on marriage for this reason: I cannot control my husband’s actions. However, I can control my own and by doing so…I can change his actions. Make sense? How I treat my husband invariably determines how he treats me. If I am unkind and insufferable…I can expect that same behavior from him. Oh, not right away of course, but in due time a man can only take so much. Men tend to be far more patient with us women because they love us and they hate to see us unhappy. Why? Because it’s bred into their gene pool. They want to take care of what is theirs. Take it from Dr. Laura, “Men admittedly are putty in the hands of a woman they love.

What I absolutely love about this book is that Dr. Laura has a way of putting the true issues right in front of your face. She doesn’t hum-n-haw about important matters and she certainly doesn’t sugar-coat it for our benefit. Thank heavens for that! I have a true appreciation for anyone that can give the facts to me straight. That is what makes this book such an intriguing read. Dr. Laura gives examples from her own experiences with struggling couples from her radio program. It is really interesting to read the dialog that goes on between her and her listeners. From the outside in it seems like these couples problems are a no-brainer. But, we all know that on the inside of a marriage, our problems just don’t seem so easily solved.

I had a lot of learning to do when I was first married. We all have to go through that period of time learning about the other person, but more importantly, learning HOW to treat the other person. We aren’t in courting-ville anymore…but we should be! Marriage doesn’t mean the end all of trying to please the other person. When I was first married I was independent to a fault, strictly clean and organized (I couldn’t even handle ONE dirty dish in the sink), and I tried my best to reform my husband’s way of thinking to be streamlined with my own. I can’t say that I was absolutely horrible…but, I’m grateful that my husband loved me enough to stay with me while I figured out that it wasn’t him who needed to change…IT WAS ME. We have both grown a great deal over the years and I have been thankful for the advice that I read in Dr. Laura’s book. It put some serious issues into perspective for me and made me realize the changes that I needed to make were necessary to the survival of my marriage.

Dr. Laura says, “Men usually mean exactly what they say and don’t speak in the more indirect style more typical of women.” It’s so true! I used to play those little mind games of dropping ‘hints’ to my husband and getting upset when he didn’t “get it”. How could he not see those subtle hints that I kept giving him?? Because, ladies, unless you point it out in plain view for them, it’s not their fault and you’re not being fair to him. Unless they’re psychic…or they’re paying extreme attention out of fear of messing up. Dr. Laura used this example given by a man named Dan:

“I am a thirty-seven-year-old man who has seen quite a bit in life, and I can offer this to your search for how to treat a man. We are men, not dumb-dumbs, psychics, or one bit unromantic. We need only clear communication, appreciation, honest love, and respect. This will be repaid by laying the moon and stars at your feet for your pleasure. There is no need to ‘work’ a man to get what you want. We live to take care of a wife, family, and home. Just remember that we are men, and know that our needs are simple but not to be ignored. A good man is hard to find, not to keep.”

Also in this book, Dr. Laura talks about how many wives contract the “Frump syndrome”. At first this gave me the giggles and then I was appalled…and then I realized the reality of this truth. Personally, I work hard to keep my figure (which had gotten more voluptuous with age — I’ll admit that), but some days I just don’t have it in me to get all dolled up. My goal? To always look amazing when my husband walks through the door from work. It doesn’t always happen. I’m definitely human. However, there have been days where I am literally running to the shower and doing my hair an hour before my husband gets home at 6:00PM…and I have not regretted doing that…EVER. Dr. Laura also talks about the clothing we choose to wear to bed (please refer to my Not Just A Pair of PJs post). Ladies, intimacy is super important in marriage. No matter how you slice it. “{Intimacy] is to a husband what conversation is to a wife. When a wife deprives her husband of [intimacy] for days, even weeks on end, it is tantamount to his refusing to talk to her for days, even weeks.” ‘Nuff said.

Now look, we all want to be an amazing wife. That is, of course, why you are on our beloved Dating Divas site to begin with, right? We all want to make our marriages not just better, but amazing!! There are a lot of tips and tricks that Dr. Laura shares in her book…a few of them I have just given you above. I just want each of you to know that I am definitely an example of a woman needing a personal change that I didn’t even realize I needed to begin with! So if you want to get serious about making some big changes in your marriage start by reading this book by Dr. Laura. Take notes, make some goals, and get to work. Incredible marriages don’t just happen, they are earned.

You can check out MORE on Dr. Laura’s website!!

How can YOU Enter THIS Giveaway?

Such a great and informative book!!  So….if you would like to enter THIS giveaway….you can do so by combining the following information….in ONE comment….

#1 – By subscribing to The DATING DIVA Weekly Newsletter {top right-hand corner of the website} & if you don’t already “like” us on Facebook, do that… and then let us know you are an official “newsletter reader” AND FB junkie in your comment.


#2 – Please share with us what you do in your own marriage to take proper care of your spouse!?!

{Include ALL of the above in just ONE comment. Thank you!!}

Would you like an EXTRA SEPARATE entry??

#3 – Spread the word about THIS giveaway via email, blog post, text message, Facebook, or Twitter {Please re-post your actual ”Shout-Out” that you sent to all your friends in your comment below & let us know which networking method above you used.  A link-back to that post/tweet/etc.  if possible, would also be great!}  Make SURE this is a separate comment than the one above…so you can have multiple entries for getting the news out!   :)

The giveaway will end tomorrow night, April 23rd at 11:00 MST. We will announce the winners on our Facebook Fan Page on Monday, April 25th – so don’t forget to check back to see if the winner is YOU!! Open only to those living in the U.S. – SO sorry!!

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Recent Comments

63 Responses to “Rockin’ Review: Dr. Laura ”

  1. Cheryl says:

    Newsletter subscriber and FB Junkie. My favorite key from the book is unwavering acceptance and appreciation. What greater gift can you give your man than for him to know that you love and care for him, no matter what. A home is a shelter from the world and a man to come home to place where his wife thinks he is the best and appreciates the little battles he goes through everyday at work to provide and care for his family.

  2. Heather says:

    I am a newsletter subscriber. To take special care of my husban. I make his lunch everyday and try to include a special note in it.

  3. Cathy says:

    I get the newsletter!! AND…
    I strive to make sure I go out of my way do one nice thing for him each day. It may not be a big thing and he may not even notice each and every thing, but I do.

  4. Jeanine says:

    I subscribe to your newsletter. To take proper care of my husband I try to leave him little surprises (little notes, fill up his car when I use it, bring him home a treat, send a little text, etc)

  5. Marilynn says:

    I subscribe to the newsletter and as a new wife (okay it has been 2.5 years) I am still trying to find what my husband would like me to do. He usually just says “Whatever” so any help I can get wold be great!

  6. Rachel says:

    I’m subscribed to your newsletter!

    I try to tell him “thank you” for the small things he does. Even if its just helping clean up the house, I want to make sure he knows I appreciate it.

  7. Sierra says:

    I am a subscriber to the newsletter and I “like” you on facebook. I am also a newlywed and still trying to figure things out. But one thing I do to take proper care of my husband is when he comes home at night I try to give him a warm welcome and also to be someone he wants to come home to by being happy instead of grumpy.

  8. Elyssa says:

    I get the Newsletter and I “like” you on facebook!

    One thing I try to do for my husband (it doesn’t always happen, but I sure try!) I try to pack his lunch for him while he is in the shower… sometimes I leave him a special treat or little notes telling him one reason why I love and appreciate him! :) Any small and simple act of kindness on my part, usually ends up benefitting me more than him!

  9. Stacey says:

    I subscribe! One thing I try to do is always have a plan for dinner. I know that doesn’t sound like very much, but it means a lot to him and is so much easier than just saying – What do you feel like? at the last second? It makes him feel like I care about him by having our meals planned!

  10. Elyssa says:

    I posted on Facebook

    The Dating Divas are having a giveaway on an awesome book called “The Proper Care & Feeding of Husbands” by Dr. Laura! Go check it out! http://www.thedatingdivas.com/kari/dr-laura-proper-care-of-husbands/

  11. BeQui says:

    I’m a facebook fan and I just subscribed. Thanks for the free printable, by the way!

    I take care of my husband by entering his paperwork from work so he can do his homework.

  12. BeQui says:

    I shouted out on facebook.

    “@The Dating Divas are giving away a copy of Dr. Laura’s book, “The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands,” on their blog.”

  13. Meghann says:

    I am a FB junkie, and receive the newsletter, (which I love), and I try to be more affectionate to him when I realize he isn’t having to good a day. It helps us from fighting and makes for an easier time to find out what is wrong.

  14. Crystal B. says:

    I am a newsletter subscriber and I have liked you on FB. I am not sure how I take care of my husband. I do make the food that he likes. And I try to give him time after work to read or do whatever he wants before the to do list comes out. :)

  15. KrisLee says:

    I just signed up for the newsletter


    While I am not married yet, I think the little surprises and taking the time to tell/show your spouse how much they mean to you should be a daily occurrence. Like many of the other commenter’s mentioned, the little texts, notes, etc can mean so much. Think back to when you first started dating how these things made you feel then – and continue to keep those feelings alive now

  16. Heather says:

    I receive your newsletters and I also love getting your updates via facebook. My husbands love language is acts of service so I try and do a couple little things for him each day so he knows that I am thinking of him and love him for all he does for our family.

  17. Crystal B. says:

    This is my blog for today!!! http://crystal-bischoff-family.blogspot.com/

    Have you ever heard of the Dating Divas? They have a great website with lots of fun dating ideas. I have entered one of their contests. They are having one that give away the book The proper care and feeding of your husbands. My friend Janie, loves this book by Dr. Laura. She says it’s great for helping our marriages. What is funny is Janie is remarrying in about a month!! She is a widow and the man she is marrying is a widower. They are perfect for each other though. I’m sure she will be digging out this book again. You can go to the Dating Divas website to enter also. http://www.thedatingdivas.com

    This is my extra entry!! :)

  18. Amber says:

    I read your newsletter and I liked you on facebook. To take proper care of my husband I leave him litte notes to find in the morning before he goes to work,make him yummy treats, read together, give him a back massage, and have a nice dinner ready for him when he gets home from work..

  19. Kelsie says:

    I am a subscriber & a Facebook junkie!
    To take proper care of my spouse I do it through the little things, cards, texts, treats, etc. I want him to have those moments when he remembers just how special he is to me!

  20. Dezi A says:

    I subscribe. And one tiny thing I do for my husband (I so need to get better at doing things) is let him have some quiet time as soon as he gets home. When he gets bombarded by the boys (and me) when he walks in the door, it doesn’t do anyone any good. He needs to unwind.

  21. Sharylann says:

    I subscribe to your newsletter, I have liked you on facebook, and to take care of my husband, I try really hard to make sure there is dinner ready when he gets off work.

  22. Cecy W says:

    I just found your website last night and I LOVE it!! I have subscribed to your newsletter and I “like” you on facebook.

    I like to send my husband random texts throughout the day just letting him know that I am thinking of him and that I love him. I also wait up for him when he works even though I have to get up early for work, just so I can ask him how his day went and let him unwind and tell me about work.

  23. Candace says:

    I am a FB Junkie and love getting the newsletter!

    I try to always have the house straightened up when he gets home and walks through the door. Example, I have all the kids take their stuff to their rooms, the pillows are back on the couch, dirty dishes are put in the dishwasher etc…. It usually only takes about 5 minutes but it really helps him be in a better mood. And I always make sure that I greet him with a big hug and kiss!

  24. Natalia Gibson says:

    I have been a facebook junkie and I have definitely ‘liked’ you guys. I have now subscribed to the weekly newsletter. To take proper care of my husband, I always try to make dinner for my husband, and try to have the house clean. It doesn’t always happen, but like you said, we are human. I am trying the best I can.

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