FAQ

1. How do you divas come up with all of your ideas?

With 11 Divas and 11 husbands, our interests vary greatly which provides for a lot of fun and different ideas! Ideas generate from everywhere: seasons, books we’ve read, TV shows, old High School dates, movies, things we love to do with our spouse, exciting events going on in our town, EVERYTHING! We often times are inspired by others. People just like you!  Anything can spark an idea for a date….a simple word or action. We try to be creative and think outside the box. A little imagination with love for your honey can go a long way! Lucky for you, we do so much of the planning that all you have to do is hop on The Dating Divas’ website and we have MOST of the work already done for you.

2. What prompted you to start this website and share all of your ideas?

We realize that family is the most important thing in life and that marriage is the foundation of the family. We all had the desire to enhance our marriages and be able to show our husbands how much we love them….after the wedding was over. You know…keep that initial spark alive! One of the Divas brought us all together and the rest is history! It was the perfect solution to having new ideas weekly without coming up with them ourselves.  We were having so much fun sharing our dating ideas with each other, we thought, “Why not share this with everyone?”

3. We are on such a strict budget, how can we afford to go on dates?

{A date is simply two people spending quality time together.}

The Divas believe that dating does NOT have to break the bank! These days we are all on a budget and that is part of the reason we started this website. We wanted to show that you can have a blast with your spouse for pretty cheap.   We try to do things that we know most people have easy access to and we give plenty of options of how to make the dates even more budget savvy! We come up with ideas that are inexpensive and even more important – memorable! You don’t have to spend a lot of money to make a date memorable. If you find a date that you want to go on and it has too many elements that hit the pocketbook, simply tailor the date to your needs! The great thing about our dates is that you can totally change them up to make them your own and fit your financial needs.

4. Can you help me plan a special date/birthday/anniversary for my husband?

We would love to give each one of our valued readers one-one help with planning special events for your spouse, but since we can’t do that, we are always trying to change things up and give fresh new ideas.  Have you checked out all of the sections on our site? We have posted so many ideas that we’re sure you’ll find just what you’re looking for under one of our many categories. Since there are 11 of us, hopefully you will find a personality that will closely match yours and you can find what you are looking for. We are going to start hosting a Birthday Week & Anniversary Week every year to help you make those special days even more memorable AND are also excited to begin a “Dear Divas” section, where you can write in asking for help with a specific event!  We can’t promise to get to all of those…but we will sure try!

5. How do you get your husbands to plan dates? I feel like I am always the one planning.

Have your husband start looking at The Dating Divas’ website!! LOL, but seriously….a lot of times if you just tell your husband what you want – he will do it. He’s not a mind reader so let him know that you would absolutely love for him to plan the next date to see what he comes up with and then have an open mind. We have found when we first take the initiative and go the extra mile for our husbands, they are more inclined to reciprocate. Sometimes it is just easier to spell it out. There is nothing wrong with just saying, “Hey, Hun/Babe/Sweetheart/Love of My Life, it’s your turn to plan something fun for me!” It would great if guys could think of this on their own but that is not always the case and it doesn’t make it any less fun that you had to tell them it’s THEIR TURN.

If your man isn’t picking up on your hints…let him know! Tell him straight out. Talk to him about switching off dates every other week or month. Even giving him a day and time to work with would be a great start. Make a list together of things you’d like to do on a date and “offer” to let him make a plan for the ones he writes down or is excited about. Some of us wives need to give our hubbies a little extra push to get the ball rolling! If he plans a date and actually takes you on it…make a big deal out of it!!  Let him know how much fun you had, how excited you are that he planned something, how you LOVE spending quality time with him!  MAKE SURE to reward him at the end of the night after his fabulous dates!!  {WINK!} This will definitely help keep those comin’!!

6. My husband is gone a lot due to business/military/school, etc. How can I keep the romance alive long distance?

You’re in luck! We are devoting an entire week to the Military couples this coming summer on how to keep your marriage strong while you are apart for long amounts of time.  Of course, nothing can replace being in the presence of your spouse. Keeping love and romance alive in your marriage long distance is tricky for sure! Keeping your communication strong and all of your good memories fresh in your minds will definitely help! The best ways to do this would be talking on the phone A LOT, sending text messages, and writing letters…not just e-mails but actual letters. Don’t underestimate the power of a LOVE letter.  Sometimes more is accomplished and portrayed to your spouse in a beautifully written letter then you can accomplish by sitting home together all night long.

For those of you who are not able to communicate with your loved one on a daily basis, there are many other things you can do. Document and take pictures of things each other missed while apart and present it in a cute way that shows you care. Make a countdown towards the time you’ll be together again or a when you can spend more time together. Share the daily life happenings with each other as you would if you were with each other all day….but make sure to keep those things positive!  Keep a picture of each other in a place where you will see it often – in your school binder, in your wallet, on the sun visor of the car… (make it a picture you’re proud of and that he’ll love seeing and sharing!)  Send out air mail as much as possible and seal it with a bright red lipstick mark each time….even spray it with his favorite of your perfumes!

We are excited to share more ideas with you during our Military Week this coming summer….but until then, feel free to browse our site!  We are positive you will find many ideas that will inspire you in your own marriage.

7. How do you balance your children, everyday life, AND still focus on your husband?

Our husbands are our first priority. We all know that if we don’t have a strong marriage then everything else will be out of balance in our lives! He comes before the children, our “to-do lists”, cleaning, work, etc.  This means that every day we look for ways to show our love to our spouses….whether it be talking about his day, ironing his shirts, packing a lunch…with a love note inside, multi-tasking earlier in the day to get the laundry done so our date night isn’t postponed….

Balancing life is tough! Remember that by keeping your marriage fulfilling for both you and your spouse…and keeping the LOVE alive…all the other responsibilities will become MUCH easier to manage!  You will have created a great team…and everyone knows that two are better than one!  Take it one day at a time and create weekly or even daily “to-do” lists {A few of the divas are obsessed with those!!}.  If your spouse is “on board”…then we would suggest sitting down at the beginning of each week or month and mapping out a plan or schedule together.  This will hopefully keep you organized, ensure the best time management possible, and then free up time to spend with your spouse and children. A little planning can and WILL pay off!

8. What would you Divas suggest for a struggling marriage?

For a struggling marriage, we would first suggest humble prayer. Throw pride out the window and take the first step to bettering your marriage. Look inside yourself as to what has changed since “newlywed bliss.” What can you do for your marriage?  Never expect your spouse to change; the only person you can change is yourself. We have lots of ideas and advice on our site for ways to rekindle your romance – all you need to do is start putting these ideas into practice. Do not wait. Do not put it off until it’s too late. Start today to take the initiative to change.

Next, try to serve your spouse and take care of his needs above your own and hopefully watch miracles happen. Forget yourself and do all that you can to make them happy. Worry about their needs and wants and completely forget yours and what you think you aren’t getting. It is easy to become selfish in your marriage and focus on what you want and need but once you flip it around, we think you will not only notice a change but your spouse will more than likely return the favor and the problems could easily be worked out…if not fixed altogether. Get back to the basics, court your spouse, recreate your first date, set aside a date night once a week, focus on your spouse, and COMMUNICATE!

Last, we would suggest counseling to overcome deep issues.  Sometimes a mediator is needed to push through hurt feelings and past regrets.  We have had several friends who have taken this route, and although it has been a hard journey for them…many marriages have been saved.  Our biggest and BEST advice for those of you with struggling marriages is to completely put your spouse first every single day!  We have done so…and we have definitely reaped the rewards!

9. Your website design is FABULOUS! Who was your designer?

Oooh, thanks!! We like it, too!! Our website was designed by the amazing Kyle at Enlightenmental Productions.  He works wonders with any theme you could give him! Kyle is so easy to work with and wants to make sure he gets everything just right!  Seriously…imagine trying to please ELEVEN women!?!  He’s pretty much a saint!  If you can use his expertise, contact him HERE and tell him the Divas sent you!  As for our graphics…they were designed by Kristen’s super talented husband, Jason.  Although he is not currently taking on any free-lance work….we are MORE than willing to pass along any compliments you send his way.

10. Can I be a DIVA?

Girl – we are all Divas!! If you’re reading our website, you ARE a Diva because you’re planning dates for your hubby and keeping your marriage alive! Being a diva is simply a loving wife who strives towards a happy and healthy marriage!  There are only 11 Divas for this site, but we would love to feature you as an honorary Diva. You are welcome to submit any dating tips, ideas or crafts for a chance to be spotlighted.