Rockin’ Review: Dr. Laura

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***This Giveaway has CLOSED.*** Please check our Facebook Fan Page for the winner. Thanks to all of you who entered!

“Dr. Laura urgently conveys to women that the to take proper care of their husbands is to ensure themselves the happiness and satisfaction they yearn for in marriage. Women want to be in love, get married, and live happily ever after. Yet disrespect for men and disregard for the values, feelings, and needs of husbands has fast become the standard for male-female relations in America, often creating struggle and strife in what could be a beautiful relationship.”

I actually read this book when I was first married. My mother-in-law purchased it and we passed it around to all of the girls in the family. Since I had the opportunity to do this review, I decided to read it again. This is by far one of my favorite books on marriage for this reason: I cannot control my husband’s actions. However, I can control my own and by doing so…I can change his actions. Make sense? How I treat my husband invariably determines how he treats me. If I am unkind and insufferable…I can expect that same behavior from him. Oh, not right away of course, but in due time a man can only take so much. Men tend to be far more patient with us women because they love us and they hate to see us unhappy. Why? Because it’s bred into their gene pool. They want to take care of what is theirs. Take it from Dr. Laura, “Men admittedly are putty in the hands of a woman they love.

What I absolutely love about this book is that Dr. Laura has a way of putting the true issues right in front of your face. She doesn’t hum-n-haw about important matters and she certainly doesn’t sugar-coat it for our benefit. Thank heavens for that! I have a true appreciation for anyone that can give the facts to me straight. That is what makes this book such an intriguing read. Dr. Laura gives examples from her own experiences with struggling couples from her radio program. It is really interesting to read the dialog that goes on between her and her listeners. From the outside in it seems like these couples problems are a no-brainer. But, we all know that on the inside of a marriage, our problems just don’t seem so easily solved.

I had a lot of learning to do when I was first married. We all have to go through that period of time learning about the other person, but more importantly, learning HOW to treat the other person. We aren’t in courting-ville anymore…but we should be! Marriage doesn’t mean the end all of trying to please the other person. When I was first married I was independent to a fault, strictly clean and organized (I couldn’t even handle ONE dirty dish in the sink), and I tried my best to reform my husband’s way of thinking to be streamlined with my own. I can’t say that I was absolutely horrible…but, I’m grateful that my husband loved me enough to stay with me while I figured out that it wasn’t him who needed to change…IT WAS ME. We have both grown a great deal over the years and I have been thankful for the advice that I read in Dr. Laura’s book. It put some serious issues into perspective for me and made me realize the changes that I needed to make were necessary to the survival of my marriage.

Dr. Laura says, “Men usually mean exactly what they say and don’t speak in the more indirect style more typical of women.” It’s so true! I used to play those little mind games of dropping ‘hints’ to my husband and getting upset when he didn’t “get it”. How could he not see those subtle hints that I kept giving him?? Because, ladies, unless you point it out in plain view for them, it’s not their fault and you’re not being fair to him. Unless they’re psychic…or they’re paying extreme attention out of fear of messing up. Dr. Laura used this example given by a man named Dan:

“I am a thirty-seven-year-old man who has seen quite a bit in life, and I can offer this to your search for how to treat a man. We are men, not dumb-dumbs, psychics, or one bit unromantic. We need only clear communication, appreciation, honest love, and respect. This will be repaid by laying the moon and stars at your feet for your pleasure. There is no need to ‘work’ a man to get what you want. We live to take care of a wife, family, and home. Just remember that we are men, and know that our needs are simple but not to be ignored. A good man is hard to find, not to keep.”

Also in this book, Dr. Laura talks about how many wives contract the “Frump syndrome”. At first this gave me the giggles and then I was appalled…and then I realized the reality of this truth. Personally, I work hard to keep my figure (which had gotten more voluptuous with age — I’ll admit that), but some days I just don’t have it in me to get all dolled up. My goal? To always look amazing when my husband walks through the door from work. It doesn’t always happen. I’m definitely human. However, there have been days where I am literally running to the shower and doing my hair an hour before my husband gets home at 6:00PM…and I have not regretted doing that…EVER. Dr. Laura also talks about the clothing we choose to wear to bed (please refer to my Not Just A Pair of PJs post). Ladies, intimacy is super important in marriage. No matter how you slice it. “{Intimacy] is to a husband what conversation is to a wife. When a wife deprives her husband of [intimacy] for days, even weeks on end, it is tantamount to his refusing to talk to her for days, even weeks.” ‘Nuff said.

Now look, we all want to be an amazing wife. That is, of course, why you are on our beloved Dating Divas site to begin with, right? We all want to make our marriages not just better, but amazing!! There are a lot of tips and tricks that Dr. Laura shares in her book…a few of them I have just given you above. I just want each of you to know that I am definitely an example of a woman needing a personal change that I didn’t even realize I needed to begin with! So if you want to get serious about making some big changes in your marriage start by reading this book by Dr. Laura. Take notes, make some goals, and get to work. Incredible marriages don’t just happen, they are earned.

You can check out MORE on Dr. Laura’s website!!

How can YOU Enter THIS Giveaway?

Such a great and informative book!!  So….if you would like to enter THIS giveaway….you can do so by combining the following information….in ONE comment….

#1 – By subscribing to The DATING DIVA Weekly Newsletter {top right-hand corner of the website} & if you don’t already “like” us on Facebook, do that… and then let us know you are an official “newsletter reader” AND FB junkie in your comment.


#2 – Please share with us what you do in your own marriage to take proper care of your spouse!?!

{Include ALL of the above in just ONE comment. Thank you!!}

Would you like an EXTRA SEPARATE entry??

#3 – Spread the word about THIS giveaway via email, blog post, text message, Facebook, or Twitter {Please re-post your actual ”Shout-Out” that you sent to all your friends in your comment below & let us know which networking method above you used.  A link-back to that post/tweet/etc.  if possible, would also be great!}  Make SURE this is a separate comment than the one above…so you can have multiple entries for getting the news out!  🙂

The giveaway will end tomorrow night, April 23rd at 11:00 MST. We will announce the winners on our Facebook Fan Page on Monday, April 25th – so don’t forget to check back to see if the winner is YOU!! Open only to those living in the U.S. – SO sorry!!


I am a very outgoing person that loves spending time with my family and friends. I have a thirst for knowledge, I am completely at home in the kitchen, and my biggest passion in life is snow skiing. I've been married to my sweetheart for 15 years and we have 3 children. I also love to travel!

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Recent Comments

  1. I love the quote by Nuff about comparing sex to the need to talk for women. Who is Nuff? Was this a quote from Dr. Laura’s book? I would like more information about that quote.

  2. I stumbled upon your post while looking for a synopsis of this book. I’m a 40 year old recent divorced man. I read this book while contemplating divorce after many years. I had never found something so direct and simple and precise in defining my needs and basic wants from a spouse. See…us men are simple creatures, We aren’t great at understanding you or ourselves. We think we are simple. Don’t complicate us because we are different. Reading the comments to this post shows me that so many wives don’t get it. Please read the book and study it as marriage and husband scripture. I vowed that my sons and daughters will read this before marriage, maybe multiple times. For my sons, so it’s clear to them how they should be treated and can identify what their needs are so they can communicate those things throughout
    their lives to their wives. For my daughters so they knows up front the needs of their man and how to have the marriage that I wasn’t able to have with their mother. I learned a great deal from this book and I hope your readers can too. I hope the women (and men) that read this post take your advice to read the book and set goals. Great summary and valuable insight you have shared.

    1. Thank you so much Steve – Those were some great suggestions and insight! After I read the book I felt like I learned a lot not only about my husband but about myself as well, so I love that you are sharing this book with your kids, too. It’s so important to be open to new ways to bring happiness to your spouse and your marriage. After all, we can’t change our spouse, only change the way we treat our spouse and our own behaviors. And I truly think so many couples struggles could be solved using some of this simple, yet spot on advice in this book. Thank you for commenting and sharing your experience!

  3. I found your site after searching for reviews on Dr. Laura’s Proper Care & Feeding of Husbands. Great review! I look foward to visiting your site more often.

  4. I subscribe to the newletter and I take extra time with my husband when the kids are napping. We watch shows on tv that he likes or just sit and chat.

  5. I give credit to Dr. Laura, Dr. Chapman (5 Love Lang), You Divas and the Christian Nymphos for taking my marriage from a 6 to a solid 10. I Love Dr. Laura and highly recommend the companion book Woman Power too. I can proudly and safely say now that when we are in a group of any size, not a single man is treated better than mine. As a happy side effect, I to now have what I always wanted in a marriage.

  6. I have already subscribed to your newsletter and I liked you on facebook. My husband is currently deplyed to Afghanistan so in every package I send him I include something special to show I how much I love him and that Im thinking about him.

  7. I am a F.B follower and a subscriber! I make sure that my husbands love language(acts of service) is taken care of!

  8. This sounds so close to another book I read by Debbie Pearl. I am already an FB’er and just signed up here. One way I take care of my husband is to constantly remember to not sweat the small stuff. When he leaves his clothes on the floor (constantly!) I remind myself that at least he’s here to leave his clothes on the floor, not in someone else’s bedroom leaving clothes on the floor (or worse, passed away). Also, his love language is touch, so we hold hands a lot and snuggle on the couch etc.

  9. I subscribe to your newsletter and Facebook. I take care of my husband by making time for him each night. Sometimes it is talking, watching TV, going somewhere, or anything that is just him and me.

  10. I am a subscriber and I am a fan on facebook and visit several times a day. I try to be a good support for my husband. He recently lost his job and so we have been struggling to make ends meet, but while he is home, we try to spend quality time with each other. We try to take care of each others physical, mental, and spiritual needs. He doesn’t like to cook, but will come sit by me or talk to me when I am. He is a sports junkie, I am less so, but I like to support him with his hobbies and will go to events with him when we can, and sacrifice my tv shows for sports events that are important to him. I would really like to win this. We have been working on building our relationship and have been reading a book called, \Between Husband and Wife\ which has been good, but we would like something else to read too.

  11. I check your website at least once a week and are on facebook all the time!!! We just talked about this book at a Girl’s night out we have and would love to have it! Some of the things I do for my husband to take extra good care of him is to leave lunch box notes, planning an extra special egg hunt for him tomorrow, and surprise him with little treats in his lunch box every now and then just to know that he is someone special!!!

  12. I am an official “newsletter reader” AND FB junkie!!! I take care of my hubby by being supportive of him in all his pursuits, I show him love as much as I can and I try to be as understanding of a wife as I can!! I try to make him as happy as I can!! After 11 yrs together come May…we’re jus as much in love today as we were in May 2000!!

  13. I’ve been a long time follower of you on facebook and subscribed to your email as soon as you came out with it!! I’d love to read this book! I love to take care of my spouse with spontaneous gifts and texts! I know he appreciates it! My husband and I are celebrating our 10 year anniversary this year! I’d love to get my hands on this book! Thanks for the chance! Ü

  14. I am a subscriber- of course! 🙂

    I am actually not married yet (July!) so I am working hard now to figure out what it takes to be a good wife. I had gotten into the habit of not worrying what I looked like around him, and changed that a month or so ago. It’s so important to make sure the one you love knows you care enough to TRY around him! I would love reading this book in preparation for our marriage! Thanks for the opportunity! 🙂

  15. Already a subscriber and I do lots of things to take care of him but probably firstly is to make him feel like a man. Men need to feel like they’re a king, they’re important, and appreciated. You make him feel like a king, and he’ll treat you like a queen.

  16. I subscribe to the newsletter, am a fan on facebook…and I take lunch to my husband on Sunday’s when he is gone all day and busy.

  17. I love getting your weekly newsletters and always keep my eyes peeled for your posts on Facebook. Something that I love to do for my spouse is leave him love letters around the house. I love seeing his face whenever he reads them. 🙂 He always gets a smile on his face and I can tell that it makes him feel good and he knows that I am constantly thinking of him. It is such a simple thing to do, and it goes a long way.

  18. I am a subscriber! 🙂 and a FB junkie. I have hear fabulous things about this book. I want to start treating my husband like the amazing man he is and stop being so selfish. I think this book will help. thanks!

  19. I am a newsletter subscriber and facebook junkie. Right now my husband is far away in Afghanistan, so I have to be a little but creative about how I take care of him. We chat on Skype every day after the kids are in bed here so that we can have one on one time. Each month I mail him a care package filled with special things that I know he will love and will help him to know that we love him. He tells me that no one around him gets as many packages from home as he does! It makes him feel special!

  20. I like to leave my hubby love notes in unexpected places and make sure he knows how much I love him and appreciate him. His love language is words of affirmation so I really try to keep that love bucket full!!

  21. Mom, Jess,
    The Dating Divas did a review of the book we were talking about last night, The Proper Care and Feeding of a Husband. Dating Divas is just one blog I follow about strengthening your marriage. They give fun ideas for dates and stuff. I sent Jess a list of a couple of other ones I follow too, like Gwen in Love, about intimacy. (The internet isn’t all bad, Mom. 😉 Let me know if you want the list too and I will show you how to follow blogs and stuff.) I believe that Satan is trying to destroy our families like never before and we must do all that we can to protect them. I also believe the first place we need to start is with our marriage. It is, after all, the foundation of the family. If we can strengthen our marriages, we will be better parents, sisters, daughters, AND better people.

    Check it out!! See you tomorrow…I’m excited!!


  22. I am a newsletter subscriber and a fan on Facebook. My husband is in school right now and I do my best to give him the space he needs to read his textbooks, do his homework etc. even when I’d rather he were doing something with me. I also proof-read his papers before he turns them in.

  23. Yes, I subscribe and am a fan on facebook. For my marriage, I also make sure that we take time for date night and to talk about things that aren’t kid related. It’s pretty tricky, but we are finally getting better at it. (BTW, I used to have the book, but I lent it out. I would love to have a copy again so that I could read it, share it, and lose it again!!!)

  24. I subscribe to your newsletter and am also a fan on facebook. I always try to take care of my husband “to be”!!!!:) Wheather it is a good meal for dinner, house cleaned and picked up, or always trying to “dress” myself up to his liking;P I love Dr Luara and have listened to her radio show for many years; although now I can’t seem to find her on a station close to home:( I would love to read her book!!

  25. My husband is finishing his last day of medical school today. YEAH!!! It has been really hard the last 4 years of school with 4 kids and student loans to go out for dates. Instead, I have tried really hard to find fun and free things to do. Most the time it was even just setting aside time to relax and talk. It always feels much better after we can chat about all the memories we have shared.

    I subscribed to your newsletter and liked you on facebook.

  26. I am now a newsletter subscriber (Thanks for the printouts!) and I like you on FB! I try to let my Husband make some decisions on his own and then be supportive of the decision he’s made. ie. choosing the vehicle he wants to drive, change jobs, etc. Things that are very personal to him. If he wants to include me in his decision I am grateful and will give my 2 cents but in the end I leave it up to him. I am pretty sure he appreciates that I don’t have the need to ‘control’ his every move.

  27. I am a newsletter reader and a facebook fan. To take care of my man I always make sure to have his favorite treat stashed somewhere in the house so if he is having a bad day I can whip it out and make it a bit better. And I always tell him how much I love him and how much I appreciate all he does for me

  28. OOooo pick me!!! I would love to read this! I am a subscriber & Facebook fan! 🙂 To take care of my hubby, I’m much like the other ladies & try to have dinner ready when he gets home from work (E-Mealz has been AWESOME for this, by the way). It really does sound like such a simple thing but seriously, he just appreciates not having to make any more decisions when he gets home from work, like “what are we going to have for dinner?”. I am constantly telling him how much I love him during the day & I definitely try to have a clean home when he walks in the door…I know how much I hate coming home to a messy house so it for sure sets the mood for the rest of the evening. 🙂

  29. I have subscribed to the newsletter! I try to always have dinner for him. It is a really big deal for him, he travels a lot and gets sick of fast food:) I also make an effort to try to tell him directly how i feel and not be wishy washy about it.

  30. I have shared this on facebook. I’m not sure how to post the link here without just posting the link to this same website…But I hope this will do. I have also posted this on my blog. I said “If you haven’t heard of The Dating Divas, well shame on you! They have great advice for marriage, and how to date your husband again. I can’t believe I didn’t know about them sooner! I discovered them a few weeks ago while I was trying to figure out what my husband and I should do for our anniversary. These ladies had some WONDERFUL ideas on what to do. You should definitely check them out!”

  31. I have been a facebook junkie and I have definitely ‘liked’ you guys. I have now subscribed to the weekly newsletter. To take proper care of my husband, I always try to make dinner for my husband, and try to have the house clean. It doesn’t always happen, but like you said, we are human. I am trying the best I can.

  32. I am a FB Junkie and love getting the newsletter!

    I try to always have the house straightened up when he gets home and walks through the door. Example, I have all the kids take their stuff to their rooms, the pillows are back on the couch, dirty dishes are put in the dishwasher etc…. It usually only takes about 5 minutes but it really helps him be in a better mood. And I always make sure that I greet him with a big hug and kiss!

  33. I just found your website last night and I LOVE it!! I have subscribed to your newsletter and I “like” you on facebook.

    I like to send my husband random texts throughout the day just letting him know that I am thinking of him and that I love him. I also wait up for him when he works even though I have to get up early for work, just so I can ask him how his day went and let him unwind and tell me about work.

  34. I subscribe to your newsletter, I have liked you on facebook, and to take care of my husband, I try really hard to make sure there is dinner ready when he gets off work.

  35. I subscribe. And one tiny thing I do for my husband (I so need to get better at doing things) is let him have some quiet time as soon as he gets home. When he gets bombarded by the boys (and me) when he walks in the door, it doesn’t do anyone any good. He needs to unwind.

  36. I am a subscriber & a Facebook junkie!
    To take proper care of my spouse I do it through the little things, cards, texts, treats, etc. I want him to have those moments when he remembers just how special he is to me!

  37. I read your newsletter and I liked you on facebook. To take proper care of my husband I leave him litte notes to find in the morning before he goes to work,make him yummy treats, read together, give him a back massage, and have a nice dinner ready for him when he gets home from work..

  38. This is my blog for today!!!

    Have you ever heard of the Dating Divas? They have a great website with lots of fun dating ideas. I have entered one of their contests. They are having one that give away the book The proper care and feeding of your husbands. My friend Janie, loves this book by Dr. Laura. She says it’s great for helping our marriages. What is funny is Janie is remarrying in about a month!! She is a widow and the man she is marrying is a widower. They are perfect for each other though. I’m sure she will be digging out this book again. You can go to the Dating Divas website to enter also.

    This is my extra entry!! 🙂

  39. I receive your newsletters and I also love getting your updates via facebook. My husbands love language is acts of service so I try and do a couple little things for him each day so he knows that I am thinking of him and love him for all he does for our family.

  40. I just signed up for the newsletter


    While I am not married yet, I think the little surprises and taking the time to tell/show your spouse how much they mean to you should be a daily occurrence. Like many of the other commenter’s mentioned, the little texts, notes, etc can mean so much. Think back to when you first started dating how these things made you feel then – and continue to keep those feelings alive now

  41. I am a newsletter subscriber and I have liked you on FB. I am not sure how I take care of my husband. I do make the food that he likes. And I try to give him time after work to read or do whatever he wants before the to do list comes out. 🙂

  42. I am a FB junkie, and receive the newsletter, (which I love), and I try to be more affectionate to him when I realize he isn’t having to good a day. It helps us from fighting and makes for an easier time to find out what is wrong.

  43. I shouted out on facebook.

    “@The Dating Divas are giving away a copy of Dr. Laura’s book, “The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands,” on their blog.”

  44. I’m a facebook fan and I just subscribed. Thanks for the free printable, by the way!

    I take care of my husband by entering his paperwork from work so he can do his homework.

  45. I subscribe! One thing I try to do is always have a plan for dinner. I know that doesn’t sound like very much, but it means a lot to him and is so much easier than just saying – What do you feel like? at the last second? It makes him feel like I care about him by having our meals planned!

  46. I get the Newsletter and I “like” you on facebook!

    One thing I try to do for my husband (it doesn’t always happen, but I sure try!) I try to pack his lunch for him while he is in the shower… sometimes I leave him a special treat or little notes telling him one reason why I love and appreciate him! 🙂 Any small and simple act of kindness on my part, usually ends up benefitting me more than him!

  47. I am a subscriber to the newsletter and I “like” you on facebook. I am also a newlywed and still trying to figure things out. But one thing I do to take proper care of my husband is when he comes home at night I try to give him a warm welcome and also to be someone he wants to come home to by being happy instead of grumpy.

  48. I’m subscribed to your newsletter!

    I try to tell him “thank you” for the small things he does. Even if its just helping clean up the house, I want to make sure he knows I appreciate it.

  49. I subscribe to the newsletter and as a new wife (okay it has been 2.5 years) I am still trying to find what my husband would like me to do. He usually just says “Whatever” so any help I can get wold be great!

  50. I subscribe to your newsletter. To take proper care of my husband I try to leave him little surprises (little notes, fill up his car when I use it, bring him home a treat, send a little text, etc)

  51. I get the newsletter!! AND…
    I strive to make sure I go out of my way do one nice thing for him each day. It may not be a big thing and he may not even notice each and every thing, but I do.

  52. I am a newsletter subscriber. To take special care of my husban. I make his lunch everyday and try to include a special note in it.

  53. Newsletter subscriber and FB Junkie. My favorite key from the book is unwavering acceptance and appreciation. What greater gift can you give your man than for him to know that you love and care for him, no matter what. A home is a shelter from the world and a man to come home to place where his wife thinks he is the best and appreciates the little battles he goes through everyday at work to provide and care for his family.