The “Erotic Blueprint”: Do You Know Yours?

Find Your “Erotic Blueprint” & Change Your Sex Life

It’s safe to say that most adults have been exposed to some sort of sex education in one form or another. Whether it was helpful, good, or adequate is questionable in most cases as well! This is exactly why Somatic Sexologist Miss Jaiya created the “Erotic Blueprints“—to help educate people about more than just the basics of how sex works but how each individual person gives and receives sexual pleasure.

Discover your own "Erotic Blueprint" and change your sex life. | The Dating Divas
A husband and wife kiss in bed after discovering their own “Erotic Blueprint.”
Table of Contents
  1. Find Your “Erotic Blueprint” & Change Your Sex Life
  2. What Is the “Erotic Blueprint”?
  3. The Five “Erotic Blueprints”
  4. “Erotic Blueprint”: Energetic Type
  5. “Erotic Blueprint”: Sensual Type
  6. “Erotic Blueprint”: Sexual Type
  7. “Erotic Blueprint”: Kinky Type
  8. “Erotic Blueprint”: Shapeshifter Type
  9. How to Use Your “Erotic Blueprint” in Your Marriage
  10. Take the “Erotic Blueprint” Theory Quiz

What Is the “Erotic Blueprint”?

Let’s face it. Most of us have learned what we know about sex from the culture we grew up in. We learned (or didn’t learn) about sex from our parents, school teachers, friends, movies, books, music—the list goes on. These influences shaped our ideas and feelings about sex: what feels good, what should turn us on, what is off-limits, and what our partners like or want.

The problem with this is that not every person is the same, and what one person loves, another might hate. For example, Sally might need mood music and candles to get her in the mood, while Joe would rather skip the ambiance and get right down to business. This is where the “Erotic Blueprints” come in!

Miss Jaiya explains, “A great sex education leads to great sex, a better understanding of yourself, and a deeper connection with your partner. Because when you know your body, you can communicate what you like—and thus increase satisfaction. And when you know a partner’s body, you have more confidence that you can please them, which ultimately deepens the bond you share.

Also, when you understand who you are erotically, you avoid feeling broken, and you know what will turn you on. When you have clear boundaries and can communicate them with a partner, you keep yourself safe emotionally and physically.”

Take the "Erotic Blueprint" theory quiz and enjoy sex with your spouse more! | The Dating Divas
A happy wife and husband sit on their bed and discuss the results of their “Erotic Blueprint” quiz.

So, essentially, the “Erotic Blueprints” can give you and your partner a deeper connection, better understanding, increased satisfaction, and more! Who doesn’t want that in their relationship? We sure do!

We will summarize and explain the five “Erotic Blueprints” below, and then feel free to go take the “Erotic Blueprint” theory quiz for yourself! You can take a basic and free “Erotic Blueprint” quiz or pay for a more in-depth quiz.

The Five “Erotic Blueprints”

On her website, Miss Jaiya has broken the “Erotic Blueprints” into five categories or types:

  • Energetic
  • Sensual
  • Sexual
  • Kinky
  • Shapeshifter

She explains that each type has its own turn-ons (where sex is exciting, arousal is ample, and orgasms are often easily achieved) and shadows (where arousal tanks and sexual connection is weak or non-existent). Below, we’ll give examples of the different turn-ons and shadows of each type.

“Erotic Blueprint”: Energetic Type

The Energetic Type Turn-ons: Miss Jaiya explains that an energetic type is very sensitive and “is turned on by anticipation, space, tease, longing, yearning.” They tend to enjoy lots of foreplay and experimenting with toys.

Anne More, a master trainer in the “Erotic Blueprints” and international sexologist, writes, “Energetic types are the sensitive, intuitive empaths of the erotic world … Sex to you starts way before any physical touch: with presence, breathing, eye gazing, and feeling one another’s energy … They can often tap into sexual energy at will, and tend to love learning and experiencing everything about tantra, kundalini, yoga, crystals, sound baths, and erotic energetic vibration.”

Find out your "Erotic Blueprint" type by taking a short quiz! | The Dating Divas
A wife and husband with an energetic “Erotic Blueprint” type face each other in bed and feel one another’s erotic energy.

The Energetic Type Shadow: Because energetic types love the anticipation and feeling connected, they can often feel overwhelmed, especially when their partner tends to move too fast or grabs or touches them before they are ready for it.

Miss Jaiya explains that energetic types “are very sensitive and need time to assimilate to sexual touch; too much too fast turns them off.” Energetics need time to feel fully merged and connected with their partner to wholly enjoy the experience.

“Erotic Blueprint”: Sensual Type

The Sensual Type Turn-ons: Sensual types are all about the romance and beauty of sex, and they feel arousal using all of their five senses. Sensuals often need to relax to have sex and need the right environment to be turned on. They need adequate time to shift from doing daily tasks to sensual, sexy activities.

Sexologist Anne More says that sensual types are often “delighted by massaging touch, warm oil, candles, beautiful and harmonious settings, sunsets, sexy dancing, music,” and they enjoy “slow, attentive, romantic lovemaking.”

When you find out what your "Erotic Blueprint" is, you will begin to better understand your own sexual desires. | The Dating divas
A husband and wife with a sensual “Erotic Blueprint” type gaze at one another in bed while setting the sexual mood with lighting and music.

The Sensual Type Shadow: Sensual types often run into the problem of being stuck inside their own heads. Because they love when the environment is just right, they often get fixated on things that aren’t right.

For example, if you are a sensual type, you “may get stuck in thought loops if the music is too loud, the “wrong” song came on, the room is messy, you’re worried that you or your partner didn’t shower, or your to-do list takes over in your head.” When sensuals are too worried about what is going wrong, they are unable to feel arousal and pleasure.

“Erotic Blueprint”: Sexual Type

The Sexual Type Turn-ons: Sexual types are simple and direct, and they often talk and approach sex in very direct language. For example, instead of beating around the bush, sexual types might directly ask their spouse, “Are we going to do it tonight?” or “Do you want to have sex?”

They are also turned on by the direct act of intercourse. According to Miss Jaiya, sexual types “can go from zero to sixty quickly … nudity, genitals, orgasm, penetration–these are some of the things the sexual loves.”

Sex is a way to relax for sexual types. Anne More explains this further by writing, “Sex, for them, is a real need for regulating their nervous system: they have sex to relax. It’s like food or air or water; it’s what makes them feel loved and alive with a sense of belonging. When they are having regular, fulfilling sex, all is right with the world, and they can approach life with a sense of resource, generosity, and joy.”

Do you know what your "Erotic Blueprint" is? We can help! | The Dating Divas
A husband and wife with a sexual “Erotic Blueprint” type begin to embrace and kiss.

The Sexual Type Shadow: Sexual types are often labeled as having a “a limited view of sexuality.” Because sex is so simple and straightforward for them, they often have a difficult time understanding a partner with a different blueprint. Sexual types often have “a narrow definition of sex, and feel that anything that doesn’t go straight to genitals and penetration, doesn’t ‘count’.

However, Anne More explains that the shadow of a sexual type also has a flipside. Because sexual types enjoy having frequent and fulfilling sex, their “love for their partner generally wins out, and sexuals can learn to expand into any and all of the blueprints and become masterful lovers in any erotic adventure.”

“Erotic Blueprint”: Kinky Type

The Kinky Type Turn-ons: Kinky types are aroused by the taboo, though this is not necessarily what we, as a culture, think of as “taboo” or “kink.” It is about what is taboo, off-limits, or naughty for that individual person.

Kinky types love exploring, breaking rules, and playing erotic games. There are two kinds of kinky types: those who enjoy Psychological Kink and those who prefer Sensation Kink.

Do you know what the five "Erotic Blueprint" types are? Read this to find out! | The Dating Divas
A husband and wife with a kinky “Erotic Blueprint” type embrace while sitting by the fireplace.

The Kinky Type Shadow: The biggest issue that kinky types have to deal with is shame in regards to their sexual desires. Anne More points out that “It’s a common misconception that people who like kink are somehow mentally ill or deranged. All kink is a perfectly normal thing to be into, as long as everyone involved is a consenting adult.”

Miss Jaiya explains that if kinky types “don’t have a supportive partner who deeply listens to their needs, they can suppress their type and become distant or develop self-esteem issues.” It is so important for a kinky type to find a partner who is supportive of their sexual desires.

“Erotic Blueprint”: Shapeshifter Type

The Shapeshifter Type Turn-ons: Shapeshifter types can easily be described by their name: they often “shapeshift” to be whatever they or their partner wants them to be.

Shapeshifter types love adventure and creativity. They are turned on by everything in all the blueprints: sexual, sensual, energetic, and kinky. Their blueprint is all of the above. Because of this, “they can please partners in any blueprint.”

You and your spouse can enjoy sex more when you find out what your "Erotic Blueprint" is! | The Dating Divas
A husband and wife with a shapeshifter “Erotic Blueprint” type relax in bed together with their feet on the headboard.

The Shapeshifter Type Shadow: Miss Jaiya points out that the problem shapeshifter types face most often is that “sometimes they shift to be what others want them to be instead of owning their own sexuality, needs and desires.”

Shapeshifters don’t usually vocalize their own preferences and sexual needs or desires. Because they are aroused by it all, they can be whatever their partner needs them to be. This is definitely a positive point, but shapeshifter types need to be careful to express their own desires every once in a while.

How to Use Your “Erotic Blueprint” in Your Marriage

Once you and your spouse know your own individual “Erotic Blueprint” type, take time to share them with one another. Research and share what you know about about your type’s turn-ons. Are any of your turn-ons the same or different? Then, discuss with one another any shadows or turn-offs your type has. This is a great way to open up the lines of communication about your sexual preferences.

For example, Sally finds out she is a sensual type while her husband, Joe, is a sexual type. Sally can now help her husband understand why it’s important for her to take time to shift her mind from “mommy mode” into “sexy wife” mode. This is a perfect time for Joe to listen and try to see why she might not want to just “do it” on the fly.

It’s also good for Sally to see that Joe may not be the most romantic man—at least looking through her sensual type lenses. However, because he is a sexual type, he can now share how he needs and craves sex with her in order to feel more deeply connected with her—which Sally might see as romantic in its own way!

Discuss your "Erotic Blueprint" type with your spouse. | The Dating Divas
A wife embraces her husband in bed while talking about their own “Erotic Blueprint” types.

Opening up these lines of communication can also be a fantastic reason to try some new things! Maybe Sally and Joe can try learning how to (safely!) sext one another throughout the day. This would help Sally get her mind ready for the night while also fulfilling Joe’s sexual type needs.

Another new idea they might try is taking a sexy shower together. Add some candles and sexy mood music, and Sally’s sensual type is happy—and Joe gets his needs met as well!

Get creative with it! We have a ton of date ideas and sexy games to help you and your spouse try new things and meet one another’s sexual needs and desires!

Take the “Erotic Blueprint” Theory Quiz

Now you know all about the different “Erotic Blueprint” types, so go on and take the “Erotic Blueprint” quiz! You can find the basic, free quiz here, or you can take a more in-depth quiz for a small fee. Make sure to have your spouse take the quiz, too!

Do you like taking quizzes? Try our Marriage Prescription Quiz. It’s a fantastic and easy way to find posts and articles related to issues in your marriage. Why should you take it? Because we love you, and we want your marriage to succeed!

You should also definitely take a look at ForePLAY Fixes, a text subscription service where steamy yet tasteful romance ideas are sent straight to your cell phone three days a week, month after month, year after year! We have all kinds of ideas for different blueprint types!


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I have absolutely loved being married to my best friend and favorite person in the world for over 16 years! My hardworking husband and I live in the most beautiful valley in the heart of the Rockies. Only ten minutes away from adventure in any direction, we love to explore the nearby mountains by camping, hunting, off-roading, fishing, hiking, and kayaking with our four energetic kids! I love all things crafty, road trips, and reading everything! Give me a book, a comfy chair, a warm blanket, and a Diet Dr. Pepper–That’s my happy place!

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