What Is Foreplay and Why Does Your Sex Life Need it?

What Is Foreplay, and Is It Important?

What is foreplay? To put it simply, foreplay is considered “outercourse,” while sex is “intercourse.” Foreplay is used to get both partners in the mood by releasing the appropriate sex-enhancing hormones.

Is it important? Absolutely! We’re sure you have questions, and we have all the answers. Consider this your ultimate guide to everything foreplay.

We highly recommend using foreplay to enhance your sex life. | The Dating Divas
This couple is excited to enhance their sex lives through foreplay!

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Table of Contents
  1. What Is Foreplay, and Is It Important?
  2. The Definition of Foreplay
  3. So, Why Is Foreplay Important?
  4. Foreplay Leads to Better Orgasms
  5. Confidence Is Key for Sexual Foreplay
  6. The Best Foreplay Ideas
  7. In Conclusion…

The Definition of Foreplay

Before we take a deep dive into the topic of foreplay, let’s read what The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, 5th Edition says foreplay is.



  1. Sexual stimulation preceding intercourse.
  2. In human sexual behavior, the acts at the beginning of a sexual encounter that serve to build up sexual arousal, sometimes in preparation for sexual intercourse or another act meant to bring about orgasm.
  3. Mutual sexual fondling prior to sexual intercourse.”

Now that we’ve covered the definition, let’s get into the fun stuff!

So, Why Is Foreplay Important?

What is foreplay? You asked, we answered. | The Dating Divas
Kissing is a great form of foreplay!

You may be thinking, “Yeah, I already know what foreplay is. But why is it important?” Let us tell you!

You’d never run a marathon without stretching or warming up first, right? You should have the same standards for sex! Foreplay is a sexual warm-up that helps both partners get in the mood.

We know that some people consider foreplay a chore, and we also know that sometimes there isn’t time for it before sex (we’re looking at you, afternoon quickies!). However, we still feel strongly that foreplay should be a priority in your sex life.

Foreplay doesn’t have to involve anything fancy, and it doesn’t need to take too much time. In fact, a quick makeout session before sex will help release oxytocin, serotonin, and dopamine. These are called the “feel-good hormones,” and for a VERY good reason!

These hormones can reduce stress, help you clear your head, and allow you to enjoy sex even more. Who wouldn’t want these hormones pumping before sex?!

And according to WebMD, “Foreplay also helps get your body ready for sex. When enjoying foreplay, you may notice your heart pounding. Foreplay causes an increase in blood flow to your genitals and helps lubricate the vagina. This makes sex more pleasurable and helps prevent pain during intercourse.

In conclusion: foreplay not only gets your body ready for the act of sex, but it also gets all those GOOD hormones charged up and ready to go. Skipping foreplay doesn’t necessarily mean the sex will be bad, but choosing to add it to the mix will definitely take sex to the next level!

Foreplay Leads to Better Orgasms

Did you know that foreplay leads to better, more intense orgasms? It’s true! According to a study conducted by McGill University in Canada, the more build-up (aka foreplay), the better the orgasm.

Likewise, The Journal of Sex Research also conducted a study that proved that foreplay leads to more intense orgasms.

Are you convinced yet? GOOD!

Confidence Is Key for Sexual Foreplay

You are going to love these foreplay tips and tricks, guaranteed to bring the heat in the bedroom. | The Dating Divas
Bring the heat by enjoying foreplay before sex!

It’s a common misconception that partners who don’t participate in sexual foreplay are doing so out of selfishness. This couldn’t be further from the truth!

Sure, there are partners out there who don’t find foreplay fun, or maybe they consider it a chore. But most partners who don’t initiate foreplay are probably inexperienced, which may lead to a lack of confidence or even embarrassment in the bedroom.

The good news is: much like with sex, practice makes perfect. {Wink!}

Even better news: we have taken the time to put together a quick list of foreplay ideas, as well as foreplay tips for women (and men!) to help you out in this area.

The Best Foreplay Ideas

Before we dive into this section, here’s another reminder that the rest of this post will contain our best foreplay ideas for the bedroom. Things are about to get really steamy, so if you are uncomfortable reading through them, feel free to skip to the last section of this post titled In Conclusion.

Foreplay Tips for Women: These tips are what men can do for women during foreplay.

  • Nipple stimulation (either by hand or vibrator)
  • Clitoral stimulation (either by hand or vibrator)
  • Kissing sensitive areas (inside of her legs, behind her ear, on her neck, etc.)
  • Licking, sucking, or nibbling sensitive areas (inside of her legs, behind her ear, on her neck, etc.)
  • Cuddling

Foreplay Tips for Men: These tips are what women can do for men during foreplay.

  • Rubbing up against the penis and testicles
  • Kissing sensitive areas (on his bare chest, on his neck, etc.)
  • Licking, sucking, or nibbling sensitive areas (on his bare chest, on his neck, etc.)
  • Penis stimulation (either by hand or vibrating ring)
  • Sexy/dirty talk

Foreplay Tips for Both Partners: These are foreplay tips that both partners can do to each other simultaneously.

  • Sensual massage. Take turns massaging each other’s bodies or sensitive areas with candle wax, oil, or lotion.
  • Taking a hot shower or bubble bath together
  • Slowly removing articles of clothing off each other’s bodies
  • Helping each other stretch
  • Naked cuddling
  • Sexting throughout the day. Check out our ForePLAY Fixes subscription (previously known as Sexy Texty) if you need help with sexting ideas!
  • A foreplay game

In Conclusion…

We've got some great foreplay ideas that we can't wait to share with you! | The Dating Divas
A couple in bed and discussing foreplay ideas from this list.

Is foreplay important? YES! Should you incorporate it into your sex life? HECK YES!

If you’re looking for a deeper connection, more time in the bedroom, more intense orgasms, and overall a better sex life, then foreplay is your answer. Plain and simple.

For more ideas to bring a bit more spice into the bedroom, check out these awesome (and tasteful!) posts:

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I am an avid DIY'er, a Disney lover, and an amateur foodie! Chips & salsa, chocolate, and Diet Dr. Pepper are a few of my favorite things. I'm married to my best friend who is literally my Prince Charming, and I'm a mommy to three darling kiddos! You'll often find me in the kitchen baking something chocolatey, or snuggled up on the couch listening to a good book or true crime podcast.

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